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Great Danes => Great Dane Discussions => : Kermit January 07, 2006, 12:32:18 AM
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This is a sob story, I will admit it right now. :'(
I'll start at the beginning. My first foster dog was a blue merle Great Dane named Darwin. He's the whole reason I found this board- I was researching Danes and bloat because I had never had such a large dog in my care and I wanted to be sure I knew the signs... anyway that's how I found BPO.
I had him for almost 2 months. He had just been through heartworm treatment. He was very ill, and honestly he just layed around all the time and got up only to go outside a few times a day or to eat meals. Otherwise he was just a big lump of love on the floor of the living room. But I got attached, bad. It was the most wonderful thing to come out of my bedroom every morning and see him wag his tail to say hi. I prayed for him to find a great home. I cried with him many nights at the thought of him leaving me someday. And when the time came he got adopted, I was crushed. But I had to let go, because he was a foster, ya know?
So I have pretty much annoyed the crap out of the guy who adopted him ever since. Sending emails and begging for new pictures of him. Asking if we could meet at the park. Checking to see how the big guy was doing. It has been about 7 months, and the guy has responded a few times and has not sent me any photos of my friend Darwin. :(
Well, tonight I got a sudden email from him. It said they have had it with Darwin, they are returning him. He has destroyed their couch, and their hardwood floor was ruined from Darwin urinating everywhere. This came to me as a total shock!! In his entire stay with me, he had but one accident. And in this guys emails to me he never once mentioned there were any problems.
I can't explain how I felt when I read the email!!! I told Will, and we had such crazy floods of emotions because all the sudden- we could get Darwin back!!!! It seemed too good to be true! Yet we were so very upset that they thought of Darwin as such a bad dog! We were happy, sad, angry, relieved- you name it!! We immediately started making plans, discussing what food we'd be feeding him, what color collar to buy him, and I pulled out the old tag I'd had engraved for him which I kept... and we even went out and bought beer to celebrate!
Then I came home to another email from the guy. Oh- they changed their minds. They are going to give Darwin another chance. Maybe they can make it work. And they hope I have a great evening.
WHAT!!??!! ???
I don't even know what to do with myself. It is Saturday night, and I am lost in confusion. :'( That's my story. Sorry it's so long. Thanks for reading, and here are some pictures of Darwin from when I had him.
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I hope you get him back. It sounds like he was much happier with you.
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Awwww! I'm so sorry you had your hopes crushed like that. So frustrating and upsetting!! I'm almost hoping he does email you back to say they've changed their minds once again!! I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. I know he'd have a better home with you and Will. You both sound like wonderful people!!
OH and I just had to add...he's gorgeous!! Thanks so much for sharing the pics. ;D
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I hope everything works out with you and Darwin. It sounds like he would be much better off with you and I think maybe he was fated to be with you.
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Oh how awful! I hope that you get Darwin back. It does sound like he was happier with you.
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Thanks, you guys. It has been a tough evening.
I forwarded that guy's emails to the rescue group and I think they will be pretty mad, but I don't know whether anything can be done.
As for right now, I am just hoping Darwin is ok. He is such a sensitive dog, I can't bear the thought that they might have been yelling at him or punishing him. :(
Will and I are still hopeful. :-\
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:( I hope you get him back....poor Darwin
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Rebekah,
That's horrible. Where does this guy live? Maybe you could offer to stop by his house to provide suggestions (for training purposes) and check things out. It would also give you a chance to emphasize that he can return Darwin to you at anytime. You can always email him and give it a try.
Deena
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I emailed the guy after he wrote me the first time- I wrote that I was sorry things didn't work out and I could come and get Darwin, and not to worry.
But then 30 minutes later is when he wrote back and said they'll keep him.
I don't see how anyone could be so wishy-washy about keeping a dog they adopted. I'm sure it wasn't easy to come to the point where he was writing me saying they didn't want him anymore. But he sent that email to me and he will never be able to take it back! If he wasn't sure in the first place he never should have written to me. Obviously they have been thinking about it for a long time!
Ugh.
Well I have to go wash up because I was letting Mokey kiss me a minute ago and then I realized she had just eaten some poop out in the yard. Yuck! :P Hehe.
Hopefully I'll hear back from the rescue group today and find out what the protocol is here if there is one.
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PLEASE let us know how this ends up. I hope you get Darwin back!
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Oh GOD Rebekah!
How terrible for you! I really hope that you can get to the bottom of all of this soon! Let us know!!!
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Rebekah
I'm so sorry that you are having all these issues - it sounds like Darwin would be so much better off with you.
I give you so much credit for fostering - I don't think I could do it; just for the reasons you say I'm sure there are SOOOOO many happy stories and happy families but I would find it hard to give up the darlings.
I hope this all works out for you and especially Darwin
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Well it is Monday morning and still no word from the rescue group. :( Well, I guess it's more of a one-woman operation now instead of a group, and I haven't heard from her. I know she is pretty busy.
Hopefully today she will contact me and let me know if we can do anything, or if we just have to wait until Darwin makes his family mad again and they get fed up with him again. :'( I just don't get it.
Anyhow, I cannot stop thinking about him. He is like Scooby-Doo in blue merle pajamas. That's how I think of him. He is big and silly. I guess it feels good to at least be here waiting for him if he should need us.
I hope I have some good news to post here later. :-[
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OK, I don't mean to sound like the negative nelly here, but I've been in the rescue business too long not to see a red flag here.
Rebekah, someone needs to exercise their right to go check on Darwin immediately. The fact that he was so adamant about returning Darwin then suddenly changed his mind makes me think he found someone else willing to buy Darwin from him.
I'm sure your rescue organization has a clause that Darwin must be returned to them if the adoption doesn't work out. You must find out immediately if he still has Darwin, but I bet he's "adopted" him out to someone else for a nice little fee for his "troubles".
Jeanne
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OK, I don't mean to sound like the negative nelly here, but I've been in the rescue business too long not to see a red flag here.
Rebekah, someone needs to exercise their right to go check on Darwin immediately. The fact that he was so adamant about returning Darwin then suddenly changed his mind makes me think he found someone else willing to buy Darwin from him.
I'm sure your rescue organization has a clause that Darwin must be returned to them if the adoption doesn't work out. You must find out immediately if he still has Darwin, but I bet he's "adopted" him out to someone else for a nice little fee for his "troubles".
Jeanne
OMG I think I just had a heart attack reading that!!!
I can't bear that thought for an instant.
Luckily the woman who does this rescue is a VERY strong-willed woman and is not afraid of anyone or anything! She would be absolutely LIVID if something like that happened!
I'll call her again and tell her I am really really worried!!!!!
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I honestly didn't mean to upset you, but you really need to check that out Rebekah. His sudden change of heart after his first horrible e-mail is just too suspect. Please let me know what happens.
I hope I'm wrong.
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I'm so sorry you're going through this. I hope you find out what's happened with Darwin and get him back. That way you know he's safe and happy.
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This is just plain awful. Poor guy! I've had my share of pee cleanups on the hardwoods, but never in a million years would I give up my BABY!!!
The whole situation seems quite shady. I'm with Jeanne; someone should go over and check this out immediately. Something in my gut just feels sick.
Poor Darwin. Please, please keep us updated Rebekah.
Fingers and paws crossed for his safe return to a loving family who understands his needs.
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Here's the update, and unfortunately not much of one. :-\
The rescue woman got all my messages. She told Will "they get this all the time"... apparently people call and say they want to return their dog, and then they change their minds, or they do it all through email...
I can hardly believe it!!
So she is "going to call the guy."
And Will made sure and told her that we want to adopt him. So now all I can do is wait some more!!! :-[
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I understand running an all-volunteer rescue is exhausting and you never seem to have enough time to do what really needs to be done, but I think these calls should at least warrant a follow-up home check. Does your adoption contract state a home check can be done at any time after adoption to check on the welfare of the dog?
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Yep, Jeanne, the contract does say that a home check can be done at any time.
I'm telling you, Will and I are about to drive over there ourselves and find out what is going on!! But I was just the foster mom so I don't really have any rights at all with this adoption. :(
I am trying not to worry but I can't stop thinking about it!
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Well, try to restrain yourself. Sometimes I can overreact when it comes to situations like this. Maybe you can call him on the pretense that you just want to offer some specific advice on training Darwin since you had him for so long and ask him some investigative questions or ask if you can come over and see what he's done so you can show him some techniques on how to get the right behaviors out of him.
Maybe you can get a better idea of what's going on with the home then.
I'm so sorry if I got you all worried, but I can't keep my mouth shut.
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Can you do a friendly 'drop by' to see him? Since you did have him for so long and you just wanted to say hi, maybe it would open the door to getting him back. That's how I ended up with Cowboy. The guy who had him before stayed in contact with one of my Newf friends and she just didn't like the sound of the situation. She ended up offering to take Cowboy off his hands and Cowboy never looked back!!!
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I do't want to "egg" you on but if your gut says to go and check on him then go. Is there anyway that you can get animal control to check on him, show them the email??
Nina
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Ok.
Wow. Just got off the phone with the rescue woman. We talked for a long time. For now we are going to keep things as friendly as possible. I am going to write the guy and tell him that we are going to come over to check on Darwin. I am going to tell him that he must have a urinalysis done. I'm going to find out exactly how long Darwin is alone every day. Luckily, since I know Darwin better than the rescue woman does, she is letting me kinda take care of things and she will back me up as I need her, and she said if we go over there and I don't like what I see, we are taking him back.
She actually made me feel a lot better. But it took an hour and a half!!!
So it will be interesting to see what he writes back!
I'll keep everyone posted for sure! This is all I can think about right now!!!! :P
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Great! It sounds like progress is being made! I hope he writes you back soon. Tell him you have almost 1000 people waiting on his reply! ;D ;D ;D
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Ack!! I just saw this thread, and after reading everything I'm practically shaking all over (I think it's in anticipation of an answer and not just b/c I haven't eaten yet).
Ugh, I cannot believe some people. I hope things work out in your favor. I would hate to see Darwin displaced again, but at least it would be to people he knows. I just hope if you do take him, that these people haven't damaged him permanently.
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Ugh, I cannot believe some people. I hope things work out in your favor. I would hate to see Darwin displaced again, but at least it would be to people he knows. I just hope if you do take him, that these people haven't damaged him permanently.
Unfortunately, Darwin was already pretty damaged before he came into rescue. He grew up on a chain. :( And I believe he was abused... if you try to hug him he is so so scared. :'(
The latest news is that I wrote the guy a very serious email. Given the tone that I used I suspect he will write back pretty dern fast. I told him we are coming over.
TO BE CONTINUED...
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Omg, Rebekah, I am so sorry! This is awful. I am praying for you and for Darwin, I just saw this thread, it didn't show up earlier! I will email you soon, I've been really sick. I am keeping my fingers crossed and hoping you get Darwin back!!
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Rebekah, I am so sorry that this happened...I can certainly understand how upsetting it must be for you!...Let me tell you a story...Sammy was my very 1st dog...He came to me completely unsocialized & untrained at 14 weeks & 43 lbs...I can't tell you the number of nights I sat & cried & told him, "that's it...in the morning you are going back to your breeder"!!...Of coarse, after a good nights sleep, it was always, "we're gonna get through this together baby"...I'm just saying in the midst of frustration people make some stupid comments...Hop efully this is the case with your situation. :) If not, they at least know where they can contact you to take him back...Why not give it a few days & e-mail to see if he is doing better?...Also, you might want to bring up the posssibility that he might have a UTI & that is why he is going in the house...Good luck! :)
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I've been thinking a lot about Darwin. Any news?
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OK. NEWS.
I just got an email from the other half of the family. Apparently the first email that was sent to me about them wanting to return Darwin was an exaggeration and a result of a minor "domestic dispute" of sorts. :P Things were supposedly blown out of proportion.
And there seems to have been a lack of communication between family members.
Apparently now everything is fine and they think Darwin's urinating is behavioral due to one of their other dogs going downhill with cancer. Apparently the dog with cancer has been getting most of the attention lately and they think Darwin is jealous. They are telling me now that Darwin gets spoiled in their house and they take the very best care of him.
I am still confused. But I am trying to be very understanding. :-[
The hardest part was getting my hopes up about the possibility of getting him back. But as long as Darwin is safe and being taken care of, and they love him, I can't just go get him back because I want him.
Don't get me wrong, I am still planning on going over for a visit!! And make sure everything is ok! And if it looks good, and Darwin looks good and happy, well I guess that is a happy ending.
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I hope that everything is OK with him. I know that you want him back, who wouldn't he is so handsome. I hope that the visit goes well and that they are taking awesome care of him. When are you going to visit him?
Nina
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When are you going to visit him?
Nina
Probably sometime this weekend.
Yeah, I guess best case scenario is that it really truly was all a misunderstandi ng... maybe a result of the stress of their other dog has cancer. I hope Darwin is happy. I still feel like I have been through the emotional wringer!
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OH YEAH!!! I'm so glad you're going to go visit him, that makes me super happy and I'm thinking you're probably happy as well! It's upsetting that their other dog has cancer I bet their emotions are just going crazy right about now! :'(
I know you still feel frustrated and stressed out by this but I hope your visit will help with those feelings, I hope you have a great time visiting that gorgeous boy!! ;D
Andi
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I'm so relieved for you - and very happy I was wrong. Let us know how things went during your visit. I'm sure he'll be happy to see you again, too.
Jeanne
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I can't even believe it, but the story continues!!!! I started this thread forever ago, January I think? And now it's June. Well, we never did get to go visit Darwin back then, we wanted to wait until there was closure with their dog with cancer, so we were putting it off (but it turns out she made complete recovery). Then they started sending us emails saying Darwin was doing great and they actually sent me some pictures finally. So we were relieved, and as a result we ended up adopting Leeloo, 'cause for crying out loud, we needed a Dane in the home!!! ;)
Well. Tonight I got an email. The couple has separated, and Darwin is being given up!!!!!! :o And incidentally, so is their other Great Dane!!!! :-[ Well, Will and I have a few more pack members now than we did back then! As in... it would be pretty tough to bring home another dog at this point!
I can't believe this is happening. I haven't written the guy back. I left a message with the rescue lady.
We are about to move to GA, we have a huge pack of dogs, and here tonight I find out Darwin needs a home... again. What is the Universe trying to do to me??? Is this some bizarre test?? I have no idea what to do, and Will is a tad bit fed up with me. :'( Thanks for letting me vent. :-[
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Can someone please explain to me what the h3ll is WRONG with PEOPLE? DOGS ARE NOT FURNITURE YOU DISPOSE OF WHEN YOU ARE INCONVENIENCED . HOLY &$*(^&(^$ what would these people do if these were skinbabies instead of furbabies? Throw them out? Put them up for adoption? This makes me insane. I HATE PEOPLE. Not BPO people, not my hubby, but EVERYONE ELSE. So now, two dogs who are bonded to eachother and these two adults will have their hearts broken.
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Thanks for the support. I am hoping that tomorrow I will feel more clear-headed and perhaps the answers will be more obvious. :-\
Well, the bright side is that one way or another I am going to see Darwin very soon. :)
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I dont really have any advice but I hope you can come up with the best solution for everyone.
Good Luck! :)
People like that do not deserve to be pet owners or PARENTS!!!!
Carole
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OMG! Yep, that e-mail in January was a definite warning for what was to come.
You must really love Darwin. In my dream world, you would get Darwin and the other Dane and live happily ever after. I know, wake up. Well, I hope whatever you decide to do will work best for everyone. It really sounds like Darwin could use a loving FOREVER home. He sure has been shuffled a great deal.
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Poor Darwin :( Please keep us updated on what happens to him.
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UPDATE AS OF TODAY.
The rescue lady and I are going to go reclaim Darwin this weekend. Will and I are going to care for him and make sure he is healthy and see what his current needs are. We'll keep him here until we move, and we will be looking for a new foster for him in the meantime, unless of course we kidnap him and take him with us to GA! ;)
It's hard to explain how I feel, I'm not worried, I am just so excited that I will have a chance to care for him again, even if it's just for a little while.
Meanwhile... I think we found Sammy a home!!! Fingers crossed that he will be going there this weekend, where he will have a Dane girlfriend to play with!!! I am so psyched for him!!!! ;D
Also meanwhile, I am trying desperately to think of somewhere that the other merle Dane can go, the female who has Addisons and went through cancer treatment! :o AAAHHHH!!! Great Danes everywhere!!!!
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Busy Busy! I'm so happy that you'll have Darwin back. We'll miss Sammy! Remember to tell his new family about bpo so we can get updates.
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Busy Busy! I'm so happy that you'll have Darwin back. We'll miss Sammy! Remember to tell his new family about bpo so we can get updates.
DEFINITELY. I think that will be in the contract... if she adopts Sammy she has to give us regular pictures!!!! ;D
The next few days are going to be CRAZY over here! I am already freaking out at the thought of Sammy moving on, but Darwin will be here! Holy cow!!!!! :D
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I'm sooo glad that it seems like things are working out. Darwin is such a lucky pup to have a guardian angel like you!
I don't know how you do it girl...I'd have to keep them all!!!
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WOW!!! Kinda makes you wonder if his behavior in Jan was a result of the stress going on in the home. Good luck with getting all the dogs in a row before your move :o
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WOW!!! Kinda makes you wonder if his behavior in Jan was a result of the stress going on in the home. Good luck with getting all the dogs in a row before your move :o
I just want her to get the dogs all in a row for a picture!!!!!!!! ;D Great news on Darwin & Sammy! ;D
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I find it TOTALLY disturbing that these people will give up a dog who has gone through, and thank God recovered, a traumatic experience with them. It's great that you will get to have Darwin again, I am praying hard for the other Dane now!
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Wow! What a rollercoaster! One goes out, one comes in. Big events!
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I am so happy for you, and for Darwin. I too am sick and sad for the other Dane.
You are a wonderful person. Darwin is a very lucky dog.
;)
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Can the rescue you work with take the female Dane?
I was hoping they would take her, but the lady is very leery of taking in another Dane right now. She didn't expect to have Darwin back, and she has something like 27 other fosters (that's a lot!). Sammy has been in rescue for almost a year, and he is a healthy dog... meaning... if it takes that long for a healthy Dane to be adopted... how long would it take for a 5 year old with Addison's disease? :-\
So I have contacted 2 other Dane rescues and it's possible that Great Creatures Rescue will be able to take Annie. Also I have been spreading the word about her to everyone I can think of, just in case there is a home out there that she could go right into.
I haven't spoken to Sammy's new potential mommy on the phone, that isn't part of my job. But I will be there for the home visit. Which we are hoping will be tomorrow. Sammy has become such a great friend to me... but this is what we've been waiting for!!! :) :'( :)
And of course I can't wait to see my pal DARWIN!!!! ;D
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I was just reading some posts hadn't even signed on; but after reading this thread I had to sign on just to say:
You are a wonderful and caring person!! The world could use so many more of you!!
Keep up the great work
Randy & Harleyb
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I'm so sorry to hear that Darwin is getting shuffled around again. I'm hoping he and the other dane can finally find good, permanent homes.
I am glad that you will be caring for him in the meantime. I'm sure he will be very happy to see you.
And congrats on finding Sammy a home. Had to check out his pawprint as I didn't remember him and he certainly looks like a real doll.
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Thanks for all the great support, you guys. ;D
I am actually a little on edge right now because I don't know when Sammy is leaving... could be tomorrow... I am so nervous! And of course had some really special moments with Sam earlier, I was just petting him and I started crying, and he looked up at me with his big brown eyes, and he put his paw on my leg and he licked my face. That kind of love is priceless. He is one of the most devoted dogs I have ever met.
I can't get Darwin until Sammy goes, but when Sammy goes I might not ever see him again, so one the one hand I am ready and the other I am not!
And just heard some terrible news a while ago, Annie the merle female is still in danger with her cancer, so no rescue groups will take her. :-[ I don't know what will happen. This is when that voice in my head comes and starts saying "you can't save them all, Rebekah"...