Some of these are hysterical and some made me weepy (sorry, hormones
)
As Mother's Day is upcoming . . . here's the REAL story on Mothers:
>
>
> Answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following
questions:
>
>
> Why did God make mothers?
> 1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
> 2. Mostly to clean the house.
> 3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
>
>
> How did God make mothers?
> 1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
> 2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
> 3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used
bigger
> parts.
>
>
> What ingredients are mothers made of ?
> 1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything
nice in
> the world and one dab of mean.
> 2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly
use
> string, I think.
>
>
> Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
> 1. We're related.
> 2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like
me.
>
>
> What kind of little girl was your mom?
> 1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
> 2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be
pretty
> bossy.
> 3. They say she used to be nice.
>
>
> What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
> 1. His last name.
> 2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get
drunk
> on beer?
> 3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and
YES
to
> chores?
>
>
> Why did your mom marry your dad?
> 1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a
lot.
> 2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
> 3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
>
>
> Who's the boss at your house?
> 1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a
goof
> ball.
> 2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under
the
bed.
> 3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than
dad.
>
>
> What's the difference between moms & dads?
> 1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at
work.
> 2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
> 3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power
'cause
> that's who you got to
> ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
> 4. Moms have magic; they make you feel better without medicine.
>
>
> What does your mom do in her spare time?
> 1. Mothers don't do spare time.
> 2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
>
>
> What would it take to make your mom perfect?
> 1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind
of
> plastic surgery.
> 2. Dye it. You know her hair. I'd dye it, maybe blue.
>
>
> If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
> 1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd
get
rid
> of that.
> 2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister
who
did
> it and not me.
> 3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the
back
of
> her head.
>
>
>