Big Paws Only Dog Forums
BPO Rescue Forum => Helpful Groups & Dogs in Need => : lilysmom October 05, 2005, 10:26:08 PM
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I'll probably get bashed for posting this, but I just don't think it's going to work out with the rescue I took in. Lily has been attacking my other dog Raven non stop. I posted in a different forum about the problem, but I didn't get many answers. I don't know what else to do but find her a new home where she can be the only dog. If anyone knows of someone in the Maryland area that would be willing to adopt her from me, please let me know. Thank You.
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How was the rescue contract, or did you take her in on your own? I wouldn't bash you for discussing what you feel is in the best interest for both girls, because you are there and know much better than the rest of us. Some girls just will not tolerate other females. Some won't tolerate other dogs at all. I hope everything will work out and you find a great home for her! Best wishes!
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I'm so sorry. Sometimes it just doesn't work, no matter how much we want it to. Dogs are like people - sometimes their personalities just clash, and Raven is your first priority.
You should be proud that you took her in and gave her a chance. You gave her love when she was rejected. You provided shelter when she was homeless. You gave her a chance when no one else would. You are still her hero.
Jeanne
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i wonder if it is a female issue, or an all dog issue. have you seen how she interacts with boy dogs? If i lived near you at all, i would take her in to see if she got along with my boy.... but alas, i am in california. want to take a road trip?
If you got her from a rescue, they willl likely take her back, or even require that you give her back to them. She is purty. I wish i lived out that way. Lots of family there, but they aren't big dog folks.
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She was a resuce from the spca and she was about to go down if no one adopted her. I will not send her back there. I do not want her to go down. I will keep her for as long as it takes to place her properly.
I contacted my vet and humane society about a behavior specialist and they both concur that if she is attacking Raven unprovoked that she needs to be an only dog. She is unbelievably sweet with humans. She follows me everywhere and always wants attention. She's never so much as lifted her lip at me even when I scold her. So I know it's not a human aggression issue. And it may be a female to female issue, but I don't want to take that chance with her. She deserves to find a permanent home and stop being moved around.
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OH NO!! I'm so sorry for you and your situation. You're trying to help your dogs and you're reaching out for help, there's no reason to bash you for that. It sounds like both your dogs aren't happy because of the situation they are in and in return it's making you unhappy, I really beleive finding a home for Lily is the best thing. Your other dog doesn't deserve to be attacked and if Lily has a dominant personality maybe she would be best as an only dog. I live in Iowa so I'm not going to be much help but I thought I'd reply to give some moral support. I truly wish you the best in this tough situation. I do beleive contacting the rescue you got her from would be your best bet. They will probably be understanding and helpful. Once again, good luck, I know this is tough for you, but I honestly think you're doing the right thing.
Andi
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I have a female Setter who LOATHES other women. We can never have a female as long as she's around. But she loves boys! Maybe Lily just has to be the Diva in the house.
Ang
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OOPPPS!! Lilysmom, we were typing at the same time. lol Hopefully someone here will come along and be of some help to you.
Andi
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Thank you for all your support. This is breaking my heart. But I won't give up until she is well placed. If everyone could just keep their eyes and ears open I would appreciate it. :)
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Is there a Dane rescue in your area? I would think that talking to them would be a great place to start....even if you agreed to foster until they find someone....
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The MAGDRL is already full and in short supply of fosters. If I give her up to them, I'm afraid I'll never be able to rescue the right one for my house. And I so want that. I have been looking for a new dane for a long time and I don't want to give up the chance to someday adopt one that is right for me and Raven. Does that sound selfish? I will unofficially foster her until I find her a new home. She will never go to a kill shelter or a home that I do not approve of.
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I am not sure if getting another dog might be a good idea considering how raven treated her....
Some dogs just dont like other animals on their territory...My suggestion would do a lot of OB with raven and remind her that what you say goes before taking on another dane
From what I remembered you said the dane was already submissive to raven and raven still wasnt happy unless i have it backwards...
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You have it backwards :) Raven is submissive. She just lays under the table now cowering every time Lily gets up. Lily will go after her unprovoked now.
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OH, i do have it backwards...I had the names backwards....I am sorry
How long have you had this dog...Until you are able to rehome her, I would make it clear that she does not run the show that you do
keep her crated and ignore her...let her out to use the bathroom and then back in the crate no attention...yo u should work with her one one one while you are looking for a new home to remind her that you were the pants not her and understand her language a little better...
Has a trainer helped you yet? Because who ever takes her needs ot have a good history on her
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I don't know if Maryland is considered New England, but the Great Dane Club of New England helps with rescue.
www.gdcne.org
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Raven will try to lick her face and make friends and Lily just won't have it. Raven wags her tail at Lily and then she backs up when Lily goes charging at her. Raven's never been mean to any dog. She has all sorts of doggie friends and doggie play dates. That's why I feel Lily needs to be the only dog.
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I have been crating Lily. I established myself as the pack leader and have been working with both dogs with where their place is in the house. Lily will back down from me. But constantly keeping the peace is a tiring job. :)
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So your dog is doing appropiate behavior and the dane still isnt having it...My only point is you need to do something before she is rehomed for the sake of everyone...
I would keep her leashed and tied to me pretty much...or crated...some dogs dont work with positive reinforcement and need a hard firm handler
My girl misha only a pup and getting challenges me (which i expected) but i welcomed the challenge. right now she is banished to her crate with no attention what so ever neg or positive...i ask like she doesnt exist...i leash her for the bathroom when she is done, back in the crate no acknowledgemen t what so ever, i wont even look at her. I will try again tomorrow
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I found early on that Lily needed a strong handler. I'm working on it. I will also only put her in a home with an experienced dane owner. I'll try the ignoring her part. I have a soft heart though. :-\
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No soft hearts... i guarantee lilly knows that...dont even make eye contact with her....
This is what I would do....
let her out of crate in morning to go the bathroom on leash. Just grab her collar put the leash on not talking or petting or eye contact..once you know she is finished eliminateing, back in crate no acknowledgemen t what so ever
you can even hold her food from her if you want to (i held breakfast this morning, if she wasnt a pup I would hold her dinner too)
then go on with your monring...
when you are ready to work with her, let her out of her crate and ingnore her...when she looks for attention, ignore her...when you ar ready, call her over, if she comes make her do a sit when she listens small treat small praise and then ignore again. If she doesnt come to you when you call her, back in crate no attention. WHen you tell her that you are ready for attention call her over repeat with treat and small praise if she doesnt, in the crate
when your other dog is in the same room or around, i would keep her leashed with you on the other end, if she gets rather nasty to your dog correction, if the dog doesnt listen, back in crate
The key here is ignoring...no emotion what so ever...you can not be angry or upset...you need to be relaxed, condifent and sure of yourself...onl y do this when you feel that way otherwise keep her in her crate...
this is your house she needs to follow your rules, not hers...
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Thank you so much for the advice. I'm going to try your suggestions. I'll let you know my progress.
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I hope that everything works out for you
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I'm sorry you're having all these problems with Lily. I wanted to let you know that I'm in Maryland also. I work in Towson and live in Westminster so if you need anything or help just let me know. I have a female dog thats pretty hard headed too so I wouldn't be able to take her . If you need another female dog to put lily in her place i'll bring mine on over ;)  heheh just kidding!  But anyways let me know if you need anything even if its just a play date. I also have a reference to a great trainer of 'problem' dogs. Â
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I KNOW you can do this...makes you a stronger character in the end...Zero and Misha have improved my own confidence because you cannot be a weak alpha
It is hard ignoring my cute fuzzball but I know what can happen if i dont...Lilly may never 'like' other dogs but she will learn to tolerate yours while you are looking for a home
Has she been aggressive with you?
DOgs love structure and schedule and respond best to it...give an inch, they will take a mile...she has no freedom until she earns it, trust me in a day or so, a light will switch on in her head in regards to respecting you and with respecting you she needs to tolerate your other dog...You can also do this with your other day (not that she is giving you any problems) i just mean the structure and schedule...she doesnt need to be banished LOL
She seems to think she is queen bee
And when you are talking to possible new owner perspectives, you can tell them what you have been doing with her and how you are getting results
ALso, keep all toys and bones off the ground, you are now in charge of playtime and when they can play
and while you are working with the dane, either keep raven crated or outside so no one gets hurt until you have more trust but still keep her leashed...i use prong collars on both my dogs when training and a correction is needed. zero needed it with the pup first moved on day one
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sounds great Rachel. Let me know the name of that trainer. PM me. I live about 45 min. north of you so a play date is a good possibility.
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I had the very same issues when I tried to rescue Nellie. They were only together one day but Sugar Bear was a mess. He would hide under the table and run is she even looked at him. I was so lucky that my brother and his family wanted a third dog. Nellie is now very happy in her new home. After that I knew that the only way it would work for Sugar Bear was for me to get a puppy. Good luck! You are doing the very best you can for both fur-babies.
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I too use prong collars when training.
Lily has never been agressive with me or any other member of my human family. Just Raven. Raven has known who's boss since day one. I've never had any trouble with her.
I've taken away all toys and bones since day one. I feed them seperately. Lily only gets fed after Raven. Is that the right thing to do?
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I agree Dixie. I think the only thing for me to do in the future is get a puppy. Their are still plenty of those to rescue too.
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Both my dogs eat in crates at the same time...my son Noah does the feedings...zer o runs in his crate and noah gives his food first and then Misa. crate doors closed and reopened after both are done
My problem is that misha growled at me this morning when I went into her crate while she was eating like I always do...Noah has been doing so much work with her, she thinks he is boss and not me LOL
she is young 18wk but she is still an alpha dog and not small at 53lbs LOL
You should prob get a pup. my advice is just for happier living for you until you find a proper home for her
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I thank you so much for your much wanted advice babs. I was just talking to my husband about your suggestions and he agrees that it would be in the best interest of Lily to work with her before she finds a new home. Thank you again.
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I emailed my friend dane breeder...she had some serious ones...i will let you know what she says