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BPO Medical Forum => Medical Conditions & Diseases => : shangrila March 20, 2006, 10:37:51 PM
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For those of you who have had to make the tough choice to send a pet on the rainbow bridge because of a medical condition: I am wondering if you could tell me how/when you made the choice. What was the breaking point for you that you knew your furbaby was in too much pain? Where did you draw the line?
I know that it may be painful to talk about, and I know that it is different for every dog, but I think it would be helpful for me to hear from some other people who have had to make the hardest choice. I have never had to deal with this before, but I know that it is in my future, and we are starting to realize we might be faced with it sooner than we had hoped. Zoey's hips are starting to fail her with increasing frequency, and we are in agony over seeing her in pain. She is still a happy and otherwise healthy dog, but her hips are getting worse every day and it is absolutely terrifying me right now. I think that I need to start preparing myself for the inevitable - no matter how soon or far down the road it may come. :'(
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Oh Heather...I'm so sorry. I can't be of any advice as I've never had to put an animal to sleep but I can offer you a shoulder to cry on and an ear to listen to you. Keep your chin up and hang in there. As always, we're all here for you and Zoey.
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I'm sorry Zoey's hips are so bad that it is making you think of this difficult topic. :'( I have had a dog put to sleep for aggression but not a health issue, so I can kinda relate to that decision but in a different way. I don't think it is ever an easy decision to make, even once you feel it is the best thing, it is still so hard. :-[
Meanwhile, have you seen this information on Ester-C as a supplement for hip troubles?
http://www.workingdogs.com/doc0039.htm
I wish you and Zoey the best. :-*
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I've never had to help a dog on the The Bridge but I have our beloved Guinea Pig, "Porkchop"...Don't laugh...To know a piggy is to love one. :) ...Anyway, up until the end she was fiesty & loving but her body gave out on her so we did the most loving thing we could do :'(...I have a friend that had to help one of her cats to The Bridge...She said she knew it was time when "Fred" couldn't get off of the couch to get his favorite treat of chicken...So, in both of out cases the spirit was willing but the flesh was weak...Their bodies wore out before their hearts & souls did...I believe that those of us who truely love our animal friends know when it "is time"...They tell us...Whether it be a gentle sigh at just the right time...the way they look into our eyes & hearts, or when they still want to please us by living but we can tell they are doing it for us...There are so manyways they say , "It would be a relief for me to go on now but I don't want to leave you broken hearted my faithful friend"...When it is time it will be clear to you because you truely love her...God bless you & Zoey.
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Oh Heather im so sorry that you may have to make this horrible choice for Zoey but I know from experience that you will know when the time comes. It is so hard to see them in pain. I had to put my 1 1/2 year old great dane Sadie to sleep after she was in a freak accident, so it was a little bit different but I will tell you it wasnt easy. It was sudden and I couldnt prepare myself at all.
The best comfort I found was right here on BPO after Sadie was gone to the bridge!!! I was totally lost without her and I truly felt like a part of me went with her but thanks to alot of very kind words from people on BPO I found it much easier to accept that I did the right thing for Sadie. I know now that she would never have been happy in pain, she loved to run and play and she needed a hip replacement and she wouldnt have ever been able to do that again.
I hope that Zoey will have lots of good times ahead and you wont have to decide for a while but I think you will know and she will let you know when she really isnt happy and in to much pain.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and Zoey now, during and after that day comes. :'(
Carole
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I'm so sorry you have to go thru this :'( On June 22 of 2004 I had my 13 year old miniature schnauzer put to sleep ... It was the hardest decision I've ever had to make in my life but I knew it was the right one . He had problems with his hips too , and also his sight and I just knew his quality of life was diminishing . I felt for a long time that it was coming , and I kept wondering " will I know it's time ? What if I make a mistake ?" but there was just one day when I saw him trying to go potty and he fell over doing that and I thought " That is not how I want my baby to live" so I made the appointment . Please make sure you are there for it , I held my baby and I don't regret that . Right now we have a 23 year old Arabian gelding that broke his leg 5 years ago and has such horrible arthritus in it that we know his time is coming soon that we will have to make the same decision , so I totally know how you feel , I'm there for you !!!!
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Meanwhile, have you seen this information on Ester-C as a supplement for hip troubles?
Yes, we have tried vitamin C. She also take cosequin and missing link to cover all our bases.
Don't get me wrong, zoey still has good days, so we are not ready to give up on her yet. But her had days are coming more frequently and with more intensity. Her left hip seems to be the biggest problem. For instance, yesterday she was limping on it, and today it has slipped out from under her several times, making her fall down. If she is on the wood floors, more often than not, I will have to help her stand up by lifting up her tummy/back legs while she pushes up with her front legs. It doesn't happen much on carpet, so we have carpeted everywhere possible, but it's still really hard to know that if she happens to be off the carpet and we don't happen to be home, she might not be able to stand on her own. She will climb the stairs on her own when we forget to put the baby gate up because she wants to be with us at night, but come morning, we have to hold her stomach and support her back legs, or else she will basically fall down the stairs... Her spirit is still shining but she is clearly struggling physically.
Zoey still has times when she is playing that you can't tell anything is wrong, but they are coming less.
Everytime I watch her fall down or think about her being in pain, I want to (and often do) cry. I knew when I got a saint that they had hip problems, but I had no idea it would be this bad this early in life. I am crossing my fingers, hoping, praying, etc that she holds on and lives many happy healthy years, but I have to admit to myself that no matter how much i want to pretend it wont, I know the hardest day is coming. I am hoping it will not come for a long time, but I am trying to be realistic and admit to myself that it might be sooner than I want because I do not want my baby to suffer.
:'(
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What about hip replacement surgery?...I would be willing to donate $ to help...& I'm sure that other BPOers would too...Zoey is a totally worthy cause! :)
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I've been through this way too many times in the last 3 years. In 2003 it was our first Pyr who was mentally ill. That was the very hard because he was only 2, so healthy otherwise but he was so dangerous. The rescue group here helped me so much to understand that it was the right thing. He really didn't want to attack any more than we wanted to be attacked. It was such a relief once it was done though that it was clear that it was the right decision.
With our next in 2004, she was 14 and happy up until the day before she died. That day she woke up and struggling for life. We are pretty sure she had something growing inside her that burst on that day. She'd been eating one piece of kibble at a time for months. She was still a happy, silly dog though and didn't seem to mind her old age, arthritis and slow eating. No question with her. It was so clear and obvious and I'm so thankful for that.
Next was Thor just this past fall. That was really hard because I loved him more than any dog I've ever had. It was hard for me to let go and I probably held on longer than I should have. He was only 5 or 6 years old which made it so hard knowing he was so young. His great love in life was going for walks and at the end he didn't want to do that any more. I had difficulty getting him to eat, he didn't want to be out at night "woo"ing which was another thing he'd always been absolutely compelled to do. When they can't do what they LOVE to do, it is time.
I'm facing it now again with Piper, who is almost 14. Piper has lived a long and full life so it is a little easier but not a lot. She's been my baby for so many years. She has ALWAYS been playful and lives to go to the barn every day. This past weekend she didn't even try to go to the barn, seemed to be struggling to breathe, couldn't get comfortable. I was ready to call the vet Monday but then Monday she was better, ready to go to the barn, breathing better. For now the good seems to outweigh the bad so I have not called. I'm watching her closely though to see when it is time. It truly is hard but each one is different. Each one you just have to weigh the pros and cons, try to decide when the dog has less good times than bad. Try to decide if they are trying to live, if they want to continue on, if they are wanting to play, getting enjoyment out of life or if they are tire, worn out in trying, not interested in living. Try to look into her heart and see what you see in there. It is SO hard when they are young.
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Poor Zoey. I think the decision even worse and so much harder when they are so young.
I had to put my old girl to sleep just before Christmas. She was nearly 11, but she'd been ill for about 2 weeks and it was obvious from her symptoms that her kidneys and liver were failing. She was going slowly downhill and when she started having more bad days than good, it was time. Her daughter took the decision out of my hands and died suddenly with no warning one night. I found that far harder to deal with that actually having to take any of my previous dogs to be euathanized.
I think you'll know when it's time.
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Unfortunately, I know the feeling too well.
My dog was a very big Lab. He lived a long, full, happy life. He was about 120 lbs and very tall (for a lab). His hips got so bad he was falling up the stairs. The only way he could go outside would be for my parents to carry him with a sling. My mom felt they should have made the decision 3 months earlier. he couldn't get up at all. Then the final decision was made.
You have to weigh the quality of life. You never want to see them go. We knew Zak (the Lab) was in a great deal of pain.
I know this is so difficult for you. It is like any other family loss.
I hope this helps. I'll pray for you.
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Shangrila, I'm so sorry that you and Zoey are going through this. I know how hard it is to see your baby in pain. Even harder when they are so young.
Have you talked to anyone at Tufts Veterinary about Zoey? I know you've mentioned before that hip replacement is not financially doable for you (and I'd be in the same boat) but sometimes those teaching hospitals will work with you. My Golden Retriever Kerry was diagnosed with Stage 5 Canine Lymphoma (basically a death sentence) and the financial side of his illness got to be too much for a college kid even with help from Mom and Dad. Tufts had an experimental program that he took part in when I was out of other options that helped out financially and they were really great about working with me. If I remember correctly there was an initial deposit (I think it was 50% of estimated costs) and then they worked out a payment plan with me. I also had to allow them to examine him after he passed to collect data which I didn't mind doing, especially if it might help someone else in the same boat someday. It gave me 8 months of happy healthy Kerry before I had to let him go. Tufts was absolutely wonderful to me and I can't say enough about them. Angell Memorial is also worth talking to although I think their policy might be a little more rigid. I know I'd definitely be more than willing to donate to a worthy cause like Zoey and I'm sure others would feel the same. If you haven't already tried, give the Accounting Office at Tufts a call and see what options you may or may not have. Maybe someone else here will have had experience with the Orthopedic department there, I dealt with Oncology but still, give them a call. It's worth a shot.
As far as knowing when it's time to let them go, I think they let you know. Kerry did for sure. He was happy and healthy and then all of a sudden one day he just wasn't. He looked at me and it could have been my imagination but I just knew he was done. I called and brought him in right away and he died in my arms. You know Zoey better than anyone, you'll see the signs and she'll let you know when it gets to be too much. It was the hardest and the easiest decision I ever made at the same time. It was hard to let him go as he'd been my childhood dog, but it was easy because I knew he was in pain and like you, I didn't want him to suffer for a second. For me it was his eyes, something just went out of them. I don't know if I can explain it, I think you just know your dog and so you know when they've had enough.
I know how much you love Zoey, it was SO obvious the day I met you all. I know you will do the right thing for her even if it is the hard thing. We'll all be here for you either way. Feel free to PM me if you need to talk. I'm thinking of you.
-Shawna
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I'm really sorry Zoey's not doing so great. I don't know the costs , but many dogs are able to live fairly pain free with horrible hips from adequan injections. I have heard some people buy the equine formula and use it as it is a bit less expensive to buy it that way, but I have no idea if that is a good idea or bad idea.
Hugs to zoey from Bava.
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I am so sorry that you are faced with this decision, it is not one I would wish on my worst enemy. I have made the choice twice, once with my beloved Bandit, because his arthritic hips were so bad that he could no longer function, and nothing the vet could give me was controlling his pain. The pain was so bad that his sweet and loving disposition was changing, and I could no longer trust him with my children. To make matters worse, he was my son's best friend and companion for 12 years. We went together to the vet, and stayed until Bannie was gone, and I will never forget holding my 16 year old as he sobbed out his grief and his heart broke.
The second time was Rocky, a 10 month old doberman puppy. He ran in the door and dropped dead at my feet at 8 months old. Dale performed CPR and got him breathing again, and we rushed him to the vet. They were unable to give me any diagnosis at the time, and we began a nightmare of vet's visits with barrages of fruitless diagnostic tests as his health declined and he stopped eating, and lost wieght. He came home from his third stay at the vet's office, this time with a diagnosis of pnuemonia, and was dragging himself to the door to greet me when I came home from work, and I looked at him...really looked at him. His stub of a tail wagging 250, his mouth open in a doggy smile as he staggered his skelital self across the kitchen to love on me. He looked at me with that look, and I knew it was time.That evening we sent him to the bridge, and some measure of peace. Years later our vet was finally able to give us a definitive diagnosis of coppertoxicosi s,a genetic disorder that was relatively unknown and incurable at the time. Sadly, despite being notified of this disorder within her lines, and the availability of testing for her breeding stock, the breeder denies it's presence in her dogs and continues to breed, prducing carriers and affected dogs.
Although I feel for your famly and Zoey, I think sometimes you just have no choice left, and you do the last thing that you can to care for your beloved baby. You let them go.
Stella
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It's a hard decision to make and unfortunately one we've had to make a few times. Once with our aussie a long time ago. When she became paralized and lost bladder control we decided we had to let her go because that was no way for such an active dog to go. With our Setter Sammy I wish we had made the decision to end it earlier but none of us were prepared and the decision was too hard of one to make but she died in my mom's arms with all of us around her but it was from a stroke and I think she suffered in the end and wish we'd made the decision to end it sooner. Mackey we had to struggle with the decision twice...she got really sick and we had to decide between exploratory surgery at 13 with a weak heart or euthanasia...w e decided to give her the chance and she pulled through even with all the odds stacked against her. She let us know when the cancer was too much for her last October. She was having a hard time breathing and she let us know.
When she starts not to be able to do the things she loves or is suffering too much that's generally the indictation... and she'll let you know when it's time. You should make a list of everything she enjoys doing and what you think it'd be intolerable for her to go without...and when the list has shown she's lost all she enjoys...then you guys should make the decision. I know that it's a hard one to make. Remember we're all here for you anytime you need advice. Your smart to be preparing for it now so it's easier to make the decision when you need to.
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Have you talked to anyone at Tufts Veterinary about Zoey?
Yes, we have taken Zoey to tufts, though not recently. They told me they only do reduced rates on shelter dogs. But even if money wasn't an issue (which is deffinately is - Dan recently lost his job and I am in the bottom ranks of the public school system), I still do not think I would want to put zoey through a hip replacement. They told us that they would have to do each hip seperately, which is two painful surgeries and two painful 3 month recoveries. Zoey hates being confined and I would hate to have her confined and in pain for 6 months.
Two things that we have not tried yet are the injections and gold bead implants. I couldn't find anyone in the area that performs them, but I am going to look again.
Thank you everyone for your thoughtful and heartfelt replies. I appreciate them. I know that I am not ready to give up on zoey yet, but I want to be prepared so that I know when the right time is. I don't want her to suffer any longer than she needs to, and I also don't want her life any shorter than it needs to be.... I guess one of the things I am afraid of is that if I don't know where to draw the line I will not make the decision at the right time. The only time I have faced this before is with my cat frisky. She was terribly ill but we kept holding on to her. When we finally realized that it might be too much for her and took her back to the vet, she had a heart attack and died in my sisters arms while they carried her out of our house on the way to the vet. She stopped us from having to make the decision, but it turns out that we should have let her go months earlier and she was suffering. I don't want that to happen to zoey. But I also want her to stick around as long as possible. I am just trying to prepare myself for the decision so I know when is the right time to let go. Some people have said that she is obviously suffering because we have to help her stand up sometimes, but others only see her on her good days and don't understand why this would even be a thought.
I don't want to think about the 'rainbow bridge' anymore than I have to, but I want to be prepared to make the decision when the time comes because right now it is hard for me to think about the possibility of it, and if I don't prepare myself mentally I will never be able to handle it when the time comes.
I am hoping and praying that her good days outweigh her bad days for years to come
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Have you talked to anyone at Tufts Veterinary about Zoey?
Two things that we have not tried yet are the injections and gold bead implants. I couldn't find anyone in the area that performs them, but I am going to look again.
I don't know where you live. If you find someone who can treat Zoey near Westchester, NY you are welcome to stay here. We have a guest room and seperate bath. There are no dogs in the house yet. (We're waiting on an AM)
I know at this time you want to do anything you can.
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I had to do it twice a year and a half ago and there is just nothing harder. Otis had a hip replacement at a year and had a great couple of years before his spine collapsed. It was the worst decision I've ever had to make. But it was clear that there was no choice. It makes me cry, now, just to think of it but I loved/love him so much that the thought of what he'd been going through just broke my heart. Lucille, my female Newf, got ITP (immune mediated thrombocyctope nia) from her immunizations and although we fought it for five months, she had no immune system left....she got a fungus which attacked her heart. That last night with her in my arms struggling for each breath....agai n, no question. Oh poop...lots of tears here...and Cowboy is trying to lick them!! lol!
Anyway, just like everybody has said...you have to weigh the good days against the bad ones. And, to lighten this just a touch, when I took Lucille in, they stablized her (drew fluid from around her heart) hoping against hope that she could fight it. It became obvious that it wasn't going to work, my wonderful vet went in to the break room and brought out the biggest piece of gooey chocolate cake you've ever seen! and gave it to her. When it was all over, we all decided that is how we wanted to go...with all those that we loved around us and chocolate frosting on our muzzles!
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My experience with these big schools (I'm near Cornell and have had a fair amount of opportunity to try this out) is whether or not there is a need for research in the area where you need help. Unfortuately hip dysplasia isn't really one of those big need areas.
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My experience with these big schools (I'm near Cornell and have had a fair amount of opportunity to try this out) is whether or not there is a need for research in the area where you need help. Unfortuately hip dysplasia isn't really one of those big need areas.
Yeah, I was thinking that too, just thought it might be worth a shot to ask. My experience was only with Oncology. They really should be doing more research in that area though considering how many otherwise healthy dogs are horribly affected by hip dysplasia.
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I am so sorry that you are going through this. It is so hard. I think about Dilbert every day, I know that we did the right thing, but it still hurts so much. We tried everything that we could to save him, but he knew it was time to go, and through his actions, told us that he had to go.
My parents had a cat that they had to pts, he was severly diabetic and he stopped eating drinking and didn't move off the couch. Again he told us that it was time to go. What made it a little easier( but not really) was that he was 12 and he lived a wonderful life.
It is never easy, but I think that you and Zoey will know when it is time.
Nina
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"Two things that we have not tried yet are the injections and gold bead implants. I couldn't find anyone in the area that performs them, but I am going to look again."
I don't know where you live but I'm in the Westchester, NY area. If you find someone here who can help you; You're welcome to stay at my house. We have a large guest room with a seperate bath. We have no dogs yet, we're waiting on an AM.
I know this can be a very difficult time. I hope you find what you need.
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I know University of Florida Vet school did a gold bead study...maybe you could call them for a referral?
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I am so sorry about, your baby, that must be really tough. Last January we lost our Aussie who we had for 14 years. It was really difficult. But he let us know when it was his time to go. We kept wondering how we would know, and when he was having trouble breating, the vet said it was time. The only thing I can suggest (and you have probably already tried it) is buffered asprin. We had our Aussie on it for a while, and it did seem to help a little bit. Hang in there. I know it is tough, sending my thoughts and prayers your way.
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May be able to find a vet that does accupuncture and/or gold beads close to you with one of these searches.
Search for Certified Veterinary Acupuncturist
http://www.ivas.org/member_search.cfm
Traditional Chinese Veterinary Medicine
http://www.chi-institute.com/
American Veterinary Chiropractic Association Doctors
http://www.avcadoctors.com/avcadus.htm
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Unfortunately we all at one point must make these decisions for our beloved pets. It’s a tough decision to make and there are plenty of factors to weigh out. Two years ago I had to put my lab down he was 17 years old he was in quite a bit of pain it got to the point where he couldn’t get up on his own. Since he was in so much pain if you tried to help him get up he would bite you. That was not fair to him to let him live like that we did everything we could for him to make him comfortable but the bottom line was he was suffering. One year after he was gone our smooth fox terrier became very ill and stopped eating he had a large tumor on his side and he to was in much pain. He to had given us 12 years of his life but I could not stand by and watch him suffer. Now my ex has one member of his dog family left she is a six-year-old Dalmatian and I know she misses playing with her brothers but she sure gets all the attention now. I have three of my own and they are my family the give me hope to keep going every day! I love this site I read about your dogs and the stories you have to tell you see the beautiful pictures that you have taken of your dogs and I love it! They are so much a part of our lives it ‘s never an easy decision to make but in your heart you will know. We will be praying for your family and zoey. Marina Mother to Bryce-Freya-Milo
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Wow. I'm sobbing.
My 18-year-old cat that I had from the age of 3 was getting up to the point where my mom was going to have to decide (I was away from home in college). One morning, right around my graduation, he had a seizure. My sister was home from school with my mom. Tiggy couldn't get up, so they took him in and sat with him while it happened.
I begged my parents to put a gerbil of mine to sleep when I was about 14. He had begun to eat his skin on his stomach and then his organs. My dad wanted to do it some other way, but I begged them to take him to the vet. They did.
Last spring, my wonderful baby Sammy came to tell us. Sammy was a semi-feral cat whom we took in at 4-m-o. He had lived behind a bar, been named by the regulars, and been fed who knows what. He was the only one of maybe 20 ferals there that would let people pet him just a little (we also took his sister who ended up being a snuggler once caught, though still skittish). Anyway, we kept his name and had a heck of a time finding the "right" home for him and Wicky. People don't usually want to wait for a cat to warm up to them. Shortly after I got Sadie, I noticed Sammy was losing some weight. Thinking that he was probably scared of Sadie and eating less to avoid being near her, I moved their food and kept watching him. His weight had fluctuated before, so I wasn't too concerned, just watchful.
One day, we were sitting on our couch talking about something and Sammy came up behind us and sat right between us on the back of the couch. He normally didn't get that close with more than one person around (actually, he normally only got that close to me; he loved being pet at 2am when I'd wake up to go to the bathroom... he'd hurry back and jump on the bed ahead of me, making me stand to pet him for a while before I got in bed). I knew something was up with just that. I looked at him and he was breathing hard with his mouth open and he had this look. I can't explain it. A cry for help, I think.
We rushed him to the vet with his sister. He was down to 5 pounds from 7 (he was a very small cat). They ran some tests but couldn't tell that anything was going on. They decided to take some xrays and sent us home. They had me pay a deposit; it was a new vet who didn't know us (we use that vet for all of our fosters). I remember paying and he was in the backroom behind held by this tech. He had to hold him by the scruff as he carried him against his chest, because he didn't like being carried. Sammy looked terrified.
Not ten minutes later, driving home, we got a call from the vet. I knew immediately. They'd tried to do the xrays and he started foaming from the mouth and died. I still feel awful for not being there. He didn't trust people. I should have been there. They did an autopsy and didn't see anything that really stood out. The vet felt responsible, I think, and spent a lot of extra time on him. She sent off some tissue and fluids and the lab said he had a congenital heart problem.
I'm already wordy tonight and now this... lol... It's kind of theraputic. You'll know. If it comes to that, she will tell you. I will keep you both in my thoughts.
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I I knew right then that it was wrong to let him do that. He laid down in his favorite spot at home and put his head in my lap, looked into my eyes and then he went to sleep forever. He looked so peaceful and painfree.
I know that I did the right thing...No one else can tell you when the right time is. You *will* know. After, I had horrible doubts. "Did I do the right thing? What else could I have done? Would waiting another day have been better" Did I wait too long?". Those will pass, I promise. Some have told me I waited too long, some say I should've waited longer. But only Porter and I know that the timing was just right.  And that's okay by me.
Take care, Heather. I'm thinking of you...
Julie
Oh My! You couldnt have explained it better! Every emotion that you might feel is written right here! Im sobbing so much thinking back to the day that Sadie went to the bridge, and everyone here is so right that you will see it in Zoey's eyes and she will let you know!
Good luck Heather! My heart is breaking for you right now! :'(
Carole
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Heather,
How's Zoey doing? I've been thinking of you guys a lot...I'm a little out of the loop...Have you all thought about surgery options? How about Adequine/Cosequine? Jackie's hips are bad, too, so I started looking for options a while ago. I've heard AMAZING things about Adequine and Cosequine.Â
Are you holding up okay? I hope so...
Julie
Yeah, I've been wondering the same thing. How's everyone doing over there?
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We are doing okay. Zoey is actually having a fantastic day today. Dan says she was whining a lot this afternoon, but she has been good since I got home (it was a half day so I got home really early today) and we even took a nice stroll around the park and she went straight to sleep fterwards but didn't seem too sore.
I am hoping I won't loose her anytime very soon, but I do worry that it will happen in the next year. The other day was so bad that I was terrified she was going to go soon, but it seems like she has rebounded from that low point and now she is back to her normal only-slightly-hurt self.
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Has she been on Rimadyl? I know a lot of people don't like it and it can have a lot of side effects....but it did make Otis a lot more comfortable. I only gave it to him on an 'as needed' basis, but it helped.
Please know that we are all pulling for both you and Zoey. I just can't imagine anything worse than watching a pup in pain! Our virtual arms are around you both!!!
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We have talked about surgery and we don't think that it is the right option for us. Besides the money (we really can't afford what we spend on zoey as it is, let alone two hip surgeries), we really don't want to put zoey through two painful surgeries and two painful recoveries. I would rather that she has a short but happy life than a long painful one.
The vet said they didn't reccommend rumadyl, but I felt like I had to give her something so we have been giving her a mild buffered anti=inflamatory and it really has made a difference. I am still looking around to see what alternative vets I can find in the area that might be able to help her.
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This may be old news to folks that post on this board, so if it is please forgive this new kid on the block.
When I got Barkley, my vet recommended right away that we begin to give him one dose of Glucosamine and Chondroitin Sulfate each day. Apparently it is known to lessen hip issues not just when they have already begun, but there were some studies (this was in 2000) that indicated it might also help to prevent hip and joint issues.
We've given him one every morning since 2000 (we just bought them at the human drugstore...ag ain, on the recommendation of our vet) and he has had no signs at all of joint issues. He has a tiny bit of arthritis in one hip and his spine - but that's it.
It is so hard to watch your baby in pain. My heart goes out to you.
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A friend sent me this article yesterday that is SO GOOD! I've really struggled to decide with Piper whether the good was outweighing the bad or not. The more I read this, the more I realized how much pain she is masking. It is time. :'(
http://www.pet-loss.net/quality.html
Defining "Quality of Life"
by Moira Anderson Allen, M.Ed.
Whenever one considers the painful choice of euthanasia, one is always advised to take the pet's "quality of life" into account. But what is "quality of life"? How can you determine whether a pet is still experiencing a good quality of life -- or whether its level of suffering is no longer acceptable?
That decision is individual to every pet, and every owner. Following, however, are some factors to consider when attempting to assess a pet's quality of life:
Mobility. An older pet often loses mobility. A dog may no longer be able to climb stairs or hop into a car; a cat may lose the ability to jump onto a bed or chair. At this stage, however, your pet may still be healthy and happy, and you can easily make accommodations for its reduced ability.
If, however, your pet can barely move, that's another matter. Can your pet get to its feet without assistance? Can it sit or lie down without collapsing? Can it walk? Can it handle basic functions, such as squatting on a litterbox? Does it whimper or growl if you attempt to move it? I've seen dogs so crippled with hip dysplasia that they literally had to drag their immobilized hindquarters across the floor; this hardly represents the "quality of life" I want for my pets.
Appetite/Eating Ability. Is your pet able to eat? Can it consume enough food (or digest that food) to remain properly nourished? Does it regurgitate immediately after eating? Is it unable to chew, or does it have difficulty swallowing? Does it enjoy eating, or do you have to coax every bite past its lips? A pet that is unable to eat or gain sufficient nourishment from its food is on a slow road to starvation.
Breathing. A number of illnesses, including cancer, can affect the lungs. When a condition causes the lungs to fill with fluid or foreign matter (such as cancer cells), a pet quickly loses its ability to breathe easily or comfortably. You'll notice that your pet may seem to be panting, or that it is laboring to breathe; often, you'll see its stomach or flanks "pumping" as it can no longer breathe with just the chest muscles. It may also experience wheezing attacks. If such symptoms occur, ask for a chest x-ray to determine the condition of the lungs. If the problem is due to an allergy, infection, or asthma, medication may help; if it is due to fluids that are the result of cancer or a heart condition, however, little can be done.
Discomfort. It can be difficult to determine whether a pet is in pain, as animals instinctively mask discomfort as much as possible. You can pick up clues, however, by watching its posture and expression. Does your pet's face appear furrowed or "worried", rather than relaxed and happy? Does it sit hunched or "hunkered" and tense, rather than relaxing and lying down? Lack of mobility can also be a sign of pain.
Another indication of pain is "denning." An animal in pain will seek a safe place where it won't be disturbed by other animals. If your pet has forsaken its usual territories or sleeping places for the back of the closet or a spot under the bed, this may be a sign that it is pain or distress and feels vulnerable.
A more obvious indication of pain is a pet's reaction to touch. If your pet responds to touch by flinching away, hissing, snarling, or even snapping, this is a clear indication of pain. Sometimes this can indicate a localized pain; if the pet doesn't want to be touched at all, however, it may indicate a broader discomfort.
Incontinence. Many pet owners feel terribly guilty over the natural annoyance they feel when a pet becomes incontinent. They feel they should be more loving, more patient. Incontinence, however, can also be stressful for the pet. As a basic survival mechanism, animals learn not to "mess where they sleep" (for the smell would draw attention to the location of one's den). When an animal can no longer control when or where it urinates or defecates, you can be sure it is not happy with the situation.
Mental Capacity. Older pets occasionally develop signs of diminished mental capacity. They may seem to "forget" things, such as where a toy is located or what a command means. Such a pet may become confused by its surroundings, and this confusion can develop into fear. (In some cases, this "confusion" may be the result of hearing or vision loss, to which both you AND your pet can often adapt.)
Happiness. Determining whether your pet is "enjoying" life is certainly a subjective decision. However, if you have been a keen observer of your pet's behavior and attitude during its lifetime, you are likely to be able to determine when it no longer seems "happy." You'll know when it no longer seems to take any pleasure from its food, its toys, its surroundings -- and most of all, from contact with you and the rest of its family. Most pets are tremendously easy to please; when it no longer becomes possibly to raise a purr or a tail-wag, you can be fairly certain that your pet is receiving little joy from life.
Response to Treatment. When a pet becomes ill, our natural response is to provide whatever treatment we can. This may mean tests, medications, even surgery. But drugs have side effects, repeated trips to the vet cause emotional distress, and more invasive treatments take a physical toll. Eventually, we may conclude that our efforts to treat a pet's illness are more stressful to the pet than the condition itself -- and that our efforts to save a pet's life are actually diminishing, rather than enhancing, the quality of that life.
Making a Decision
Assessing a pet's quality of life is an ongoing process, not a one-time decision. Initially, we're likely to attempt to compensate for the problems we see. Pain medication may relieve a pet's discomfort and improve its mobility. A change in diet may improve a pet's appetite or provide better nutrition. We may resolve that we're willing to clean up after a pet and carry it wherever it needs to go, for as long as necessary. But eventually such measures will cease to be effective. The process of assessing "quality of life" is really a question of determining (and deciding) when that point has been reached -- and what you intend to do next.
It is often tempting, at this point, to postpone a decision still longer by deciding to "let nature take its course." Before choosing that course of action (or inaction), however, it's important to understand that, as a pet owner, you have been thwarting the "course of nature" from the beginning. By ensuring that your pet has food and shelter and is protected from predators, you have already guaranteed that nature will not take its course. By providing medical treatment, you have prolonged the life of your pet far beyond what it could have expected if left to "nature." In nature, an animal that becomes too ill to obtain food or protect itself will perish quickly, though not necessarily comfortably.
Nor does nature necessarily offer an "easy" death even if you choose to let it "take its course" in the comfort of your home. An animal that cannot breathe easily, cannot eat or digest food properly, cannot control its bodily functions, and can scarcely move or enjoy human contact because of pain, is hardly dying "comfortably."
This is really what the "quality of life" issue is all about. By usurping nature's role throughout the life of our pets, we must sometimes also accept its role in determining (and bringing about) the death of a pet. To accept this, we may also have to accept that, in some cases, the quality of life we're really trying to protect is our own: That we're allowing our pet to suffer out of a desire to avoid the anguish we know that we will experience when it dies. And that, ultimately, is the most unselfish act of love we can offer: To end a pet's suffering, we must choose to accept our own.
Copyright © 2001 by Moira Allen. This column originally appeared on Allpets.com.
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It's a tough decision to make.
Missy was 14. She had a heart condition that suddenly got so bad she couldn't sleep, breath or move much. As much as I loved her and wanted her to stay with me, I knew she didn't want to suffer, nor did I.
There comes a time when they all must pass over to the bridge and a time that we have to let them go there. It's a personal decision as to when you do that.
Just knowing she had had a long and good life was comforting for me. I loved her too much to keep her alive on medications and watch her deteriorate more and more.
On a strangely good note...having them put to sleep is a completely painless and peaceful thing. I was in the room with Missy and will be with any other dog I have and it was a bitter sweet moment. But it was peaceful.
Like Dahlie said...waiting a day longer wouldn't have made it better for her...only me in a way. It would have been selfish for me to keep hanging on to Missy. I too know I did the right thing...and I will always have her with me.
Good luck with your decision.
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I've had to make the decision to send my "baby" to the bridge and I still cry about it. Stitches was 12 and she had dropped considerable weight. For a cat to DROP to 12 pounds...yeah something was wrong. Just after I got Jager I noticed Stitch was acting funny, drinking a lot of water, less active, etc. For the first 2 mos I assumed she wasn't adjusting well to the dog. I took her into the vet and she had dropped from 23 lbs to 18 but that didn't explain the drinking. She was tested and they found that she had diabetes. After spending a crazy amount of money on that vet visit and learning how to give her insulin injections everyday she got a little bit and then started rapidly declining. She could barely stand on her back legs at all, she just kind of slid across the tile. So I spent more money (which wasn't necessarily a bad thing because I got to be with her longer) to adjust her insulin and have her on prescription diet. then one day in nov she couldn't make it into her box. She wasn't eatting or drinking and just looked at me as to say "Mom....please." I could hardly call the vet to make the appointment. My mom left work to drive me to the vet. Jager just laid down in his crate as I was walking out of the house and let out a whimper. The staff was excellent and let us hold her for the whole thing. She growled at the dr which was nothing new (I don't particularly care for him that much either). She looked up at me one last time with her big gold eyes as if to say "I'm okay" and I lost it....kind of like I am now!
What everyone is saying though is true! Zoey will let you know and you'll know. "Mom knows best." Hopefully and from what it sounds like, she's doing well and you won't have to make that decision anytime soon. Good luck to you and Zoey and I'll keep you both in my thoughts.
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Ok. Today probably wasn't the day to sit and read all the responses to this question! The article from Longshadowfarm s was very timely for me though. I know that Barkley's time is coming ... far more quickly than I'm prepared for ... far more quickly. I think we're probably talking days now...weeks seems like a luxury. He is panting a lot at night now. And when he sleeps, he's sleeping so soundly ... not even snoring, which he always did! This morning he's already peed in the house once, and also came upstairs with me ... just sitting and staring at me ... which he never does.
I know it's the 'right' thing to do, but holy cow, it hurts to even to think about making that appointment. This sucks.
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Sit and talk with him, he will let you know when the time is best for him. Sending big hugs, we are here if there is anything we can do.
Lisa
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I am so sorry that you may have to come to such a heartbreaking decision, you have my sympathy and support. Annie our first Newf started with Cancer at 18 months. She had her jaw amputated and continued on in seeming good health till about 9 years old, when her thyroid started to fail and she once more started to develop cancer, this time in the chest. She was on her feet to the last but as her breathing got harder we took her to the vets for an x ray. we had spoken to the vet before taking her and had made the descision in conjunction with him that as she was sedated for the x ray, he would leave her sedated until the plates were developed and that if it was as bad as we feared he would increase the sedation until she passed away. On the 20 minute trip to the vets I got through 2 boxes of kleenex and was terrible when saying my goodbyes, I am still upset now recalling what it was like. There is no easy way through it, just tears and heartache and all I can suggest is that when the time comes, think of the good times. its not easy but a new puppy does help.
Andy
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Ok. Today probably wasn't the day to sit and read all the responses to this question! The article from Longshadowfarm s was very timely for me though. I know that Barkley's time is coming ... far more quickly than I'm prepared for ... far more quickly. I think we're probably talking days now...weeks seems like a luxury. He is panting a lot at night now. And when he sleeps, he's sleeping so soundly ... not even snoring, which he always did! This morning he's already peed in the house once, and also came upstairs with me ... just sitting and staring at me ... which he never does.
I know it's the 'right' thing to do, but holy cow, it hurts to even to think about making that appointment. This sucks.
Making the appointment is hard. I remember that. I cried all day every day for the week before the Saturday I took Missy in.
It's hard...so so hard.
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Wish I had some ideas on how to cope. It is so hard! I think the only thing that helps me is knowing that they are not suffering any longer and knowing I did all I could to make their lives as wonderful as I could. For me, an addition to the family does take away from the memory of the last dog, but it certainly does help you not to dwell on it too much. Some people will say they can't bear to go through the loss again but I think the years of love and joy outweigh the months of pain of loss.
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Some people will say they can't bear to go through the loss again but I think the years of love and joy outweigh the months of pain of loss.Â
I totally agree with this. What is that quote about how we give our animals what time and energy we can spare and in return, they give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made. It's something like that anyway. They just give so much and ask so little in return.
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I know it's the 'right' thing to do, but holy cow, it hurts to even to think about making that appointment. This sucks.
Would your vet come to the house? It is all so awful to even contemplate, but the peacefulness of staying at home might be just a touch easier.... :'(
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Would your vet come to the house? It is all so awful to even contemplate, but the peacefulness of staying at home might be just a touch easier.... :'(
Another friend suggested that as well. I'm going to think about it. Our vets are so awesome that I'm sure they'd do whatever is best for Barkley. Having said that, he has been such a special friend of everyone at the vet's that I feel like they might like to be with him as well. Thanks for the suggestion. He's having such a good day today that I'm putting it aside for today. One day at a time.
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I had Thor done at home. My own vet will not come to the house (I'm almost 45 min away anyway) so I went with our cow vet group. They do handle dogs as well within their normal work, I just don't use them normally for my dogs. Had not seen that vet before but she was wonderful and it worked out as well as it could. I could not imagine trying to handle 150 lb of dead dog in and out of the car, plus driving while bawling my eyes out. I was an absolute mess over Thor's loss. With Josh and Piper, we went to our own vet, DH drove and helped move them to the car. I really wish we could have done it at home but I'd kind of pushed my luck a bit with the other vet group last time since they aren't my normal vet. I figured we could handle this one on our own and save them for the really difficult cases (big dogs). It was kind of nice having my own vet do it but if given the choice, I'd take the home option ANY day, even if it was a new vet. Piper was stressed a bit by being in the vet's office. When she was young she liked going to the vet but the last few years she found it stressful. That said, if the new vet was not pleasant, that could make it more difficult. If you can manage to get your own vet to come to your house, that would be ideal but unfortunately it doesn't always work out that way. If not, perhaps they can recommend a "come to your house" vet who would be good to work with. I'm sure your vet will understand wanting it done at home if you can manage it.
One day at a time is one more day of lovin to hang onto.