Big Paws Only Dog Forums

Well, not so much, really. 

After a few years of getting minimal trick-or-treaters, and now just moving to a place where I have a feeling I won't get ANY, my zest for Halloween decorating has gone right into the toilet.  Which is sad, because I love love love Halloween. 

But today I put forth the minimal effort.  Below are pictures of my sad and pathetic decorating. Someone please post some pictures of your elaborately decorated house complete with dry ice, strobe lights, and a paper-mache' dragon's head that actually breathes fire coming out of the second story window and make me feel better about my favorite holiday!   

Ever wonder why... ? 

Ever wonder something really silly?  Something that probably doesn't really have an answer, and is too stupid to actually ask someone else, but bugs you none the less.  I thought I would start a new game to answer all the un-answered questions that rise up in our minds and haunt us so that we can't sleep at night...

Post a question (serious or not-so-serious), and the next person to post has to answer it and then ask one of their own.  They can be doggy stuff (like, tell me why dogs paws smell like corn chips) or non-doggy related (like, tell me why hot dogs and hot dog buns don't come the same number to a package). 

Could be fun, probably will be kinda lame, but here we go!

TELL ME WHY...  that Alton Brown guy is in EVERY show on the Food Network... 
(Fortunately, we have a high tolerance for him in my house.)

Hi all,

As I have stated before, I am still around - just not very much.  One of these days I will get a better internet connection and then I will be back in chat and bugging you all on a daily basis!

Just thought I would stop in and share a picture of what I did to myself on my 40th birthday...  I finally got up the courage to get the tattoo that I have wanted for so long.  I carried this design around me literally for YEARS trying to get brave enough to do it.  It is a design done in the '30's by a tattoo artist named Cap Coleman, slightly modified.  I have always just loved the colors and shading in the picture...  This is from the day I got it, and it isn't the best picture, but you get the idea.

Since so many of you have been kind enough to share your tattoo pictures in the past, I thought I would reciprocate.  Oh, and for those of you who do not have a tattoo and were wondering - yes, it hurt like h*ll.  But at least I didn't embarass myself by crying or wetting myself like I thought I might!   

Well, as most of you know, I finished my old job this last Wednesday and start my new job this Tuesday (tomorrow).  That gave me five whole days to do nothing... um, I mean finish up important household tasks!

First off, on Thursday, Scott and I used our annual passes to go to Disneyland.  It was pretty crowded, which I didn't expect on a Thursday in winter, but I am just spoiled by too many days of going when there is no one there.  And the Haunted Mansion was closed...  The highlights?  We got our own car all to ourselves on Indiana Jones (a party with a wheelchair backed out at the last minute, and they had to send the car with just us in it to stay on schedule), and seeing Steve Carell from The Office.  I swear I was THIS close to him...  Ooh, and the fried cheesecake at the Blue Bayou restaurant.  Mmmmmm, fried cheesecake...

On Saturday and Sunday, I went to our biggest local dog show.  Scott had to work on Saturday, so the plan was that I would go alone and we would go back together on Sunday.  Well, that ALMOST worked out...  I saw so many great dogs, you guys - I wish I had brought a camera with me.  There was a "Meet the Breed" area that included Pyrs, Newfies, Dogue de Bordeaux and Bull Mastiffs.  I spend tons of time with the Pyrs, and got my face kissed repeatedly by a huge and beautiful boy named Lance.  There were two 4-month old pups that I tried to fit into my purse, but their tails kept sticking out and I couldn't get away with it.  I watched the judging for the Danes and the Saints, and I re-met what I think is San Diego's only Leonberger, who I had met the year before.  His sister was with him this year, and if anything, she is even bigger than he is.  They think she is a Leo/Pyr mix.  There were lots of big dogs there to love on, including a Neo that was too drooly even for ME to pet!  I bought a big monkey toy on Saturday, and of course had to buy another one on Sunday, since Gwen and Ranger each decided it was their new favorite and refused to share.  I was obviously insane not to buy two in the first place.

The reason Scott couldn't go on Sunday?  He is sick.  Of course, I am completely unsympathetic and keep screaming at him that he can't get me sick because I have to start a new job.  I have him locked in the bedroom, as far away from me as possible, but I think he sneaks out and sneezes on things when I am asleep...  As far as the day before a new job goes, it hasn't been the best... despite sleeping in seperate rooms for the past two days I am feeling a bit under the weather myself.  Plus Ranger threw up this morning (I think we just played a bit too hard after breakfast), and I got summoned for jury duty.  And I don't feel like doing laundry!   

So, I am excited/terrified about tomorrow.  But that gorgeous Pyr boy thoughtfully scouring all the make-up from my face at least provided me with some much needed exfoliation, so I am sure I will look my best...   

So many great dogs this weekend - I wish you all could have been with me!

This is kind of fun...

http://home.epix.net/~mhryvnak/theyfightcrime.html

Here is mine - He's a sword-wielding devious boxer possessed of the uncanny powers of an insect. She's a time-travelling junkie advertising executive who believes she is the reincarnation of an ancient Egyptian queen. They fight crime!

I know we have all probably seen this before, but we could all use a smile this morning, I am sure....

Things That Movies Teach Us

1. Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people--whether they are employed or not.

2. At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil.

3. Should you decide to defuse a bomb, don't worry which wire to cut. You will always choose the right one.

4. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society.

5. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts: your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

6. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.

7. If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.

8. Honest and hard working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.

9. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their arch enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers, and man-eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.

10. All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets that reach the armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.

11. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.

12. It's easy for anyone to land a plane providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.

13. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off--even while scuba diving.

14. You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.

15. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German or Russian accent will do.

16. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.

17. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

18. If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.

19. If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.

20. Word processors never display a cursor on screen but will always say: Enter Password Now.

21. Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.

22. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.

23. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

24. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you meet will know all the steps.

25. Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.

26. When they are alone, all foreign military officers prefer to speak to each other in English.

27. All telephone numbers in America begin with the digits 555.

28. If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St. Patrick's Day parade - at any time of the year.

29. During any police investigation, it is necessary to visit at least one strip club.

30. The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty.

31. If you need to reload your gun, you will always have more ammunition - even if you haven't been carrying any before now.

32. When paying for a taxi, don't look at your wallet as you take out a bill - just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.

33. Mothers routinely cook eggs, bacon and waffles for their family every morning even though their husband and children never have time to eat it.

34. Cars that crash will almost always burst into flames.

35. Medieval peasants had perfect teeth.

36. Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.

37. It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.

You know how sometimes something happens with your dog, and you TOTALLY overreact?  Well, that was us last night...

I was just sitting down to dinner.  We are, of course, total gourmets in my house, so it was a big bowl of mac and cheese, and I was really looking forward to it.  About two bites in, I noticed that Ranger was playing with a fleecy ball on the floor.  We normally don't leave these lying around, because we don't let the dogs play with them unsupervised.. . 

I asked him "Are you being nice to your ball?", and Scott said "Yeah, he is ok.  He pulled all the stuffing out of it, and he is chewing on the empty fleece."  I said "OK.....  Ummm, wait..... WHERE MIGHT THE SQUEAKER BE???"

We both jump up and look EVERYWHERE for the squeaker to the ball.  We can't find it anywhere.  So, of course, we come to the logical conclusion that if it is not anywhere that we can see, it must be somewhere we CAN'T see - like Ranger's stomach.  I am not 100% sure at this point that he would have eaten it, but he has done similar things in the past, and better safe than sorry.  We now realize that there is no choice but to make our poor puppy throw up.  We head outside with Ranger and the hydrogen peroxide.

To make a long story short (and significantly less disgusting), we come back inside after about 20 minutes of Ranger violently heaving up everything in his stomach and us poking through it with a stick.  (OK, that was still pretty disgusting.)  I am SOAKED with hydrogen peroxide, which Ranger has somehow managed to learn to pretend to swallow, and then shoot back out through his nose at me.  My hand is slightly chomped.  Ranger HATES us now, and retreats to his lair under the end table to shoot death rays at us from his eyes...

Scott sits back down on the couch, and as I am staring into my congealed mac and cheese, trying to decide if I am too grossed out now to eat it, I hear a sound.  SQUEAAAKKKYYYY .  SQUEAKKKKYYYYY Y.  Scott is holding up the missing squeaker.  I ask him where he found it. 

He was sitting on it.

I gave Ranger permission to bite him.   

Last night I accidentally put Ranger in a situation that he was uncomfortable with, and, overall, I was very proud of his behavior. Turns out the big dummy CAN learn, after all!   

As many of you know, I have been working hard to get Ranger over his reaction to certain strangers crowding him and reaching for his head.  To make a long story short, on a couple occasions in the past, he has growled or air-snapped under these conditions - even when he has solicited the attention in the first place...  I have been working with him on presenting his belly to strangers when he wants a pet, and that has been working extremely well.  Not only does he get a treat a for doing so, he gets a belly rub, (which he loves), and it eliminates the possibility of his head being grabbed.  He will now approach ANYONE in the park and molest them in search of a belly rub, whether they seem the slighest bit interested or not.  His comfort level with children has increased about 100%, and it has been MONTHS since he has had an uncomfortable reaction to anyone...

So, enough backstory.  Last night, we were at the park on our daily walk.  Ranger was doing his usual trick of laying down and soliciting attention from people whenever we passed them, but no one had petted him yet.  He also has a new trick - I have no clue where he picked it up.  Whenever we pass a certain bench in the park, he now jumps up onto it and sits there.  He then wants me to sit down too, so that he can climb into my lap, and we sit there together for a few moments looking around the park.  We were on our bench last night resting, when a mother and daughter approached us and said "Can we pet?". 

Now, I admit - I was not paying attention.  I didn't even see them until they were right on top of us.  I said "Sure, but he needs to get down on the ground...."  Well, their English wasn't that good, and they moved right in and began to pet him while he was still on my lap.  They both crowded around him and went right for his head while I was still working on getting out from under him and getting him off the bench.  He let them do this for a bit, then decided that he didn't like this and that Mommy obviously wasn't handling things.  He let out one big WOOF - not a string of barking, or an aggressive bark - just a WOOF.  They stepped back and we both got up.  He laid down on the ground, belly up, and happily solicited (and accepted) more petting. 

Now, don't get me wrong - I don't want him barking at people.  But, due to my own stupidity and lack of attention, I put him in a situation that he didn't like and that he felt he needed to handle (totally my bad, I admit).  And overall, he handled it well.  It was a much less extreme reaction than he would have had before and it showed me that he has learned at least some minimal coping skills.  He reached into his "mental toolbox" of ways to deal with the situation and chose the least offensive one.  Good on him!  (Mommy learned a lesson too, by the way, which is that she must remember to stay focused and in control of situations.  It is my responsibility to be a leader for Ranger and show him that I am in control and will deal with things that he is uncomfortable with.  I failed in that last night.)  So, I guess if even my horrible monster can learn, there is hope for every dog out there!