Author Topic: Blast from the past with a question (sorry, it's long!)  (Read 6839 times)

Offline Mom2Sadie

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Blast from the past with a question (sorry, it's long!)
« on: July 18, 2008, 10:22:47 am »
Hey everyone! You guys may or may not remember us. I'm Shawna and I'm mom to a teeny Newfie named Sadie. It's been ages since I last posted. Things got a bit out of control in my life for a while and I needed to retreat to my own little corner and figure stuff out. Sadie and I have been through the ringer together and we're finally starting to come out on the other side (I think).

Part of the reason I stopped posting was that I was having MAJOR issues with Sadie and as much as I appreciated the support I found here I was starting to worry that you all would get sick of listening to it. Not to mention it almost hurt reading all your posts about your amazing doggies when I was having such issues with mine. Sadie was the cause of a bit of drama in our neighborhood (through absolutely NO fault of her own), which I think is around the last time I posted. It took quite some time to resolve that and during that time I started feeling majorly sick and run down. Also around that time Sadie started developing horrible separation anxiety which then became generalized anxiety. She started having accidents again when she was left by herself. She would howl and frantically paw at the door if I so much as left her by herself to go to the bathroom. She was also amazingly destructive. She'd go to the bathroom in her crate if I crated her, but if I left her out I never knew what disaster I'd come home to. At first I thought that stuff was just her picking up on my not feeling well or reacting to the tension in the house (since I had quite a bit going on personally), but very quickly it became a huge issue. She was fearful of anyone but me - those of you from the New England area who have met her know that she was anything but fearful, it was a 180 degree change and it seemed to happen overnight (although I'm sure it didn't really, I just missed the gradual signs). Thankfully she was never fear aggressive, but I couldn't take her anywhere without her being totally anxious and freaked out and miserable. I was beside myself and I felt like it was something I was doing wrong. We have worked really, really hard with our vet, and a wonderful trainer/behaviorist that our vet recommended but it was pretty brutal for awhile. I was SO frustrated with her and with myself. As much as I love her, I was starting to think I wasn't the right mom for the job. I'm highstrung and a worrier myself and I was starting to think I was making my dog afraid of everything. We kept at the training with our behaviorist and didn't give up and finally, now it seems like we've turned the corner. She's back to her old goofball self for the most part, doesn't need the anxiety meds as much and is OK with meeting new people again. Not to mention that all that one on one work with a trainer strengthened our bond immensely.

Having said that, a big part of the improvement, in my opinion, was a new addition to the family. My boyfriend moved in with us and together we adopted a 5 year old Boxer who was being retired from a breeder after having her last litter of puppies. Sadie loved having a buddy to hang with and it was really good for her. Lady (yes Lady and Sadie - gross) was a better dog trainer than I'll ever be. Despite being half her size, she mothered Sadie and even disciplined her when she got bratty and out of line. She was definitely the alpha and, pardon the pun, but Sadie just followed her around like a puppy. On top of that, Lady was an absolute joy. She was perfect on a leash even without ever having had an obedience class and was such a snugglebug. She was a very special girl. We absolutely adored her. Unfortunately, Lady became very ill, very quickly and within a week of her first symptoms presenting was diagnosed with alimentary lymphoma. It's a type of lymphoma that occurs in the digestive tract and causes intestinal lesions and prevents the dog from being able to absorb any nutrients even when they are able to eat. She lost weight rapidly and within just a few days, Lady was so thin and weak that she could hardly walk. By the time we even knew what it was she had lost so much weight you could see every bone in her body. We had started her on Prednisone to see if we could improve her appetite since our vet didn't think she could survive surgery or chemotherapy without putting on some weight but it became clear very quickly that it wasn't working and she was suffering. We made the impossible decision to put her down last Saturday morning. Our hearts are broken and we miss her desperately. I haven't stopped crying since it happened. But probably the hardest part of losing her is watching Sadie mourn. She isn't eating. She howls and whines a bit at night and paces around aimlessly. Her potty stuff is all messed up - not having accidents but just not going at all (just #2 though, she is still urinating regularly and drinking water). She has no energy. She just isn't herself. I understand how she feels - I'm not MYSELF yet either. I know that she will get over it, or maybe I'm even projecting what I'm feeling onto her and imagining it's worse than it actually is, but I also know she isn't eating or relieving herself and that worries me given her history of anxiety. I took her to our vet who couldn't find anything physically wrong with her but suggested she might be experiencing her own grieving process. I'm wondering if any of you have experienced something similar and if you might have any ideas for us as to how to make it easier for her? I'm at a loss and I figured it was time to crawl back to BPO and grovel for advice. I can use any suggestions you all might have. 

I have missed this community very much, especially when I was going through Lady's illness recently. And Sadie has definitely missed her NE Newf Pack buddies. I just felt like I was starting to be that poster who never has any good news and I know that can get old really fast. And it was too hard coming here every day and reading about all the amazing pups around here when our situation was so difficult and frustrating. I'm hoping that I can get Sadie to feel better again so that I can have good news for you all instead of always being so gloom and doom. Thanks for reading (if you got through all that) and I hope it's OK to pop back in like this. I've missed you all.
Dear Lord,
Just for today, let me be the kind of person my dog thinks I am.

Shawna
Sadie the Newf
Gus and Maggie - Maine Coon Kitties
Lady the Boxer waiting at the bridge

Offline Ali

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Re: Blast from the past with a question (sorry, it's long!)
« Reply #1 on: July 18, 2008, 10:36:40 am »
OH MY GOODNESS!! You and Sadie have really have a time of it! And finding and losing Lady so quickly - that's just horrible.. :'( :'( You were lucky to have found Lady - she showed you that you are a great pup mom, and she showed you that Sadie may be a handful, but she's a great pup. If you think about it, it seems like in her short time with you, she taught you LOADS of stuff about how great you guys are and what you both need from each other. Maybe that was her purpose for joining your family before she passed. She had one more very important thing to do in her life, and she did. When the time is right, maybe another new family member is what the doctor ordered. In the mean time, hang in there. Grieving...wel l, it just sucks. That's my professional opinion! Glad you are back...you've come to the right place! BTW, it should be mentioned that with all Sadie was going through (before Lady) major kudos to you for not giving up on her. Lots of people would have, and you didn't. And THAT is why you are a great Newf mom! Rest peacefully Lady - you'll be so missed, little girl. :'(
Ali
mom of 4 humans AND
Tani (TAH-nee or rhymes with "Bonnie")- Aussie/Pittie?Boxer?Mutt!
Kai - Aussie/Dobie
Kenji - big ol' black cat
Mika and Nishi - kitty sisters, foster failures!
Tasia Ladysnake - ball python

Offline Winslow 151

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Re: Blast from the past with a question (sorry, it's long!)
« Reply #2 on: July 18, 2008, 12:54:43 pm »
Hi,

WELCOME BACK Winslow misses you both!!! Me Too buy the way ;-) PM  me a ton of stuff locally that might help!! The New Dog Park opened up in Lowell!! So maybe that will help Sadie socailize some!!

Glad to hear from you!! and please you know any of the NE pack is always ready to listen!!

Rich
Happy Tails to All
Winslow's Dad

Offline GoldenPyrs

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Re: Blast from the past with a question (sorry, it's long!)
« Reply #3 on: July 18, 2008, 04:49:51 pm »
OH MY GOODNESS!! You and Sadie have really have a time of it! And finding and losing Lady so quickly - that's just horrible.. :'( :'( You were lucky to have found Lady - she showed you that you are a great pup mom, and she showed you that Sadie may be a handful, but she's a great pup. If you think about it, it seems like in her short time with you, she taught you LOADS of stuff about how great you guys are and what you both need from each other. Maybe that was her purpose for joining your family before she passed. She had one more very important thing to do in her life, and she did. When the time is right, maybe another new family member is what the doctor ordered. In the mean time, hang in there. Grieving...wel l, it just sucks. That's my professional opinion! Glad you are back...you've come to the right place! BTW, it should be mentioned that with all Sadie was going through (before Lady) major kudos to you for not giving up on her. Lots of people would have, and you didn't. And THAT is why you are a great Newf mom! Rest peacefully Lady - you'll be so missed, little girl. :'(



Hi Shawna & welcome back!  I heartily second what Ali said!  It sounds like Lady made a huge difference in your family though sadly in such a short time.  I'm sure that she felt very loved & happy with you.  I'm so sorry for your loss.

Yes, we've dealt with a grieving pup before, too.  Daisy, our Golden mix was 7 y/o when Halley, our 3 y/o Pyr had to be PTS due to bone cancer.  It was horrible for all of us, we all were just devastated, but poor Daisy developed absolutely horrible vomiting & diarrhea.  We had one occasion where we rushed her to the vet b/c within 1/2 hour she'd gone from fine to her being unable to get up while being sick from top & bottom constantly.  Scared the life out of me!  It started a month before Halley left us and continued for a few months after until our vet finally figured out that she had IBD & changed her diet.  He thinks that the stress & grief may have set the IBD off.  The diet change brought the stomach issues under control but she was still depressed, panic-y & insecure.  In our case, the big "cure" came when we adopted Cassie & Sammy.  Though we'd thought that Daisy might benefit from some one-on-one attention by being the only dog (silly us), it turns out that she's happiest by far with doggy siblings.  That might just be the case with Sadie, too.  Just like some humans are more self sufficient & some need more companionship, I really think that that is the case with dogs, too.  When you are ready, you might want to take Sadie to the dog park that Rich mentioned or arrange a play date & see if she blossoms around the other dogs.  It may just take that special "someone" though to make her happier again.  Please give her a gentle kiss on her nose from me.  I feel so badly for her loss, too.   :'(
Marie

And my pups:
Daisy a 9 y/o Golden/Lab mix
Sammy a 6-7(?) y/o Great Pyrenees adopted 3/07
Cassie a 3 y/o Pyr/Mystery Snuggle Bunny mix adopted 2/07

My angel girls waiting at the Bridge:
Cara 1989-2001 Great Pyrenees
Sally ? - 1993 Dobie(rescued '92)
Halley 2002-2006 Great Pyrenees

Offline Tspanos

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Re: Blast from the past with a question (sorry, it's long!)
« Reply #4 on: July 18, 2008, 05:37:28 pm »
This is Erin posting under Tim's ID since I'm on his laptop.  I'm so sorry to hear about Lady.  I'm sure Sadie is going through the grieving process. Have you tried giving her her favorite foods I know she's a people food fiend from our meetngreets. With our past few losses we had three at the time so it didn't hurt the others as badly since they still had a buddy. When you're ready you may want to get her another buddy but definitely don't rush into it.  With Winslow living so close you should try meeting up with him so maybe she can cheer up a bit.  Let us know if you need anything...the NE Newf Pack is always ready to help out like Rich said.  Hopefully we can have another meetngreet once it cools off a bit so Sadie can get some buddy time.

RIP Lady. And hugs to you all!

Erin

Offline Tspanos

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Re: Blast from the past with a question (sorry, it's long!)
« Reply #5 on: July 18, 2008, 06:06:45 pm »
Hey Shawna, Missed you guys! I don't have much to offer other than to say try hanging out with Rich and Winslow some or what about your parents' Shepherd, do they still have him? I guess what I'm getting at is just getting her with old friends for some relaxed playtime. Keep us posted.

Tim

Offline Scootergirl

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Re: Blast from the past with a question (sorry, it's long!)
« Reply #6 on: July 18, 2008, 06:55:08 pm »
Oh, Shawna!! What a rock you are! I don't think Sadie could have picked a better mom.  You are so wonderful for not giving up on her like so many people would.

I feel for your loss with Lady, too.  You were definitley blessed to have her in your life for such a short time, and I agree that, when the time is right, Sadie would probably benefit from another companion. Maybe she could come along to pick her buddy out this time.

Finally, don't EVER feel like you are bugging us with your "problems". That is precisely what we are here for. We will always stick by you until your issues are resolved. Don't feel like you have to take everything on yourself. We want to be here for Sadie's challenges AND her triumphs. Trust me, all of us who brag about our dogs ALSO have those days when we ask ourselves what we got ourselves into.

Big hugs and welcome back!
"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principle difference between dog and man." -- Mark Twain

Offline navarre1316

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Re: Blast from the past with a question (sorry, it's long!)
« Reply #7 on: July 18, 2008, 11:39:49 pm »
Do you have a blanket or pillow that was Lady's that you haven't washed yet??  If so give it to Sadie, she may lie on it for a few days and that may help her.  I know it helped with mine when Navarre died.  Just a thought.

Good luck with Sadie and as everyone has already said; kudos to you for sticking by the little lady!!
God placed me on this earth to accomplish certain tasks...I'm so far behind I'll never die!!

Navarre: GSD 9/13/99-5/14/06 patiently waiting
Issabeaux: GSD 1/27/07
Daphne: Boxer
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